Tonight we are going to do an ice-breaker for a change (for everyone reading this you can try it with some friends). Everyone puts up both their hands (like hands up - you're under arrest). Then go round the circle and everytime it is your turn you must say something you have never done, for example, "I have never ever in all my life - been married." Now if any person in the circle is married or has been married they must put down one finger. Go round the circle and the one in the end with the most fingers left up is the winner.
You'll soon discover doing this that everyone has done many things and many of these things represents changes - getting married, moving to a new town, traveling, taking a risk etc - good changes and bad changes.
Think about a few more such as:
What is the most difficult choice you have had to make in your life up to this point?
What has been the most important goal in your life up to this point?
What do you look forward to most about growing old?
What is the most risky thing you'd like to try doing?
Let's take a look at Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
Change is to be expected. In fact the whole Bible is full of change. Our Christian lives are sure to be full of change.
So how are we supposed to handle changes in life? Paul gives us some guidance in Philippians 4:4-13 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. I rejoice greatly in the Lord that at last you have renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
It isn't easy but I love these verses because they teach us not that everything will be fine all the time, but that in everything we must be thankful and look for the best always being thankful because we know that "we can do everything through God who gives us strength."
I do believe this is possible to truely live. We're also told that Jesus really does understand how changes can be difficult, because he has had to go through what the world is like already. Hebrews 4:14-16 Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
The God of the Universe understands because he has gone through having to live on this planet. He gets it and he cares and wants to help us through it.
These next verses are difficult one's because they teach us that we really need to patiently accept the circumstances that God gives us.
1 Corinthians 7:17 Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches.
Sometimes we are in a place or situation because God put us there - for our own good or for someone elses good. Sometimes we need to stay where God put us until He chooses to put us somewhere else. Of course only the Holy Spirit can help us know when this is the case - but if we consider God in everything we do and each decision we make - I believe that God moves us where He wants us when we allow Him to direct our lives. And if He isn't opening a door for you to leave then maybe He is wanting you to simply remain where you are.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
It comes down to trusting God no matter what He puts in our path or where He takes us, trusting that He knows what He is doing and has reasons for everything.
Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
In your own time take a look at Psalms 91 and Proverbs 3:5-12 - take these with you as your surety - we can trust Him, He knows what is best.
Psalms 91 (Nothing will happen to you that is not in God's will) He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust." Surely he will save you from the fowler's snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked. If you make the Most High your dwelling— even the LORD, who is my refuge- then no harm will befall you, no disaster will come near your tent. For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone. You will tread upon the lion and the cobra; you will trample the great lion and the serpent. "Because he loves me," says the LORD, "I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation.
Proverbs 3:5-12 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones. Honor the LORD with your wealth, with the firstfruits of all your crops; then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine. My son, do not despise the LORD's discipline and do not resent his rebuke, because the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.
It isn't about believing IF God exists or not, it’s about BELIEVING God, and that’s the most difficult. God says, "Come back and quietly trust in me. Then you will be strong and secure. But you refuse to do it" Isaiah 30:15. If you are struggling with spiritual stuff then you know that someone is UP THERE, but can we trust what He says? And why, why, why does He allow so much bad stuff? Why did He allow you to be sexually abused? Does He just not care? How do we make sense out of everything?
Friday, 1 May 2009
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This Weeks Bible Study...Blessed Are Those Who Mourn
The Beatitudes
Matthew 5:4
Our Lord does not present the Beatitudes in a random manner, everyone was carefully and prayerfully thought through by our Lord and given a precise place in the spiritual sequence. Last week we saw that the poor in spirit are favoured by God. The kingdom of heaven is for people who are broken, depressed sinners. People who really need God. Once we see that entrance into the kingdom of God is through acknowledgement of our spiritual poverty and the acceptance of Christ’s resources then we are ready to go on and consider the next Beatitude.
"Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matthew 5:4
At first glance the second Beatitude seems somewhat strange and difficult to understand. How can someone who mourns be contented and blessed? Most commentators say that what Jesus is pointing out here is the need to mourn over our sin, to face up to the pain it causes us, and then to find comfort in Christ. But, did our Lord have something else in mind as well as this? Such as the need to face, feel and process the pain that arises within us when we meet with difficult and distressing circumstances. Mourning is the process of grieving, and grieving involves coming to terms with loss and all its attendant emotions. Our unwillingness to face the pain that comes from our losses and the hurts and injuries that occur in our lives, and mourn because of them, is one of the major causes of psychological problems. Reality must be faced. A famous psychiatrist once said, "People can’t take too much reality so they run down the convenient road of denial. And that road is a crowded highway. I should know because that is where I have to travel to find most of my patients." Being willing to accept that life is difficult will save us from unrealistic expectations which can trigger stress and even depression. Then, when troubles come, we are not surprised, but face reality in the confidence that no matter what happens to us, God will turn it to good. (Taken from Every Day With Jesus, The Blessed Life, 15 July)
Pain is temporary but denial and its consequences are forever!
When we look at life with a realistic gaze we see grim and depressing things happening around us. There are, of course, many good things that happen to people, too, but we must not blind our eyes to the bad things that occur and thus deny reality. We don’t have to become preoccupied with the sad things by constantly thinking about them, but we do have to accept that they happened. Integrity requires that whatever is true must be faced. (Taken from Every Day With Jesus, The Blessed Life, 16 July)
When an emotion arises within us which we know is unacceptable and is likely, if it continues, to mar our spiritual experience, we must not pretend it is not there. We must acknowledge it. However, it is important that we do not dump that emotion onto another person. You do not need to express an emotion to deal with it effectively, but you must acknowledge it. All we have to do is to yield to the Spirit. He will help us keep our emotions in check. Our Lord does not want us to be mastered by our emotions but to draw upon His power so that we remain in the position of mastery. When our stomachs are churning with grief, sorrow or hurt, instead of pretending that we are not feeling the pain, we should come before the Lord with a prayer something like this: "Lord, right now I am hurting so much I do not think I can endure it. I feel like screaming, running away or even hitting someone. I don’t want to feel like this, Lord, but I do. Thank you for loving me as I am. Help me know to handle my feelings in a way that glorifies You and honours Your name." In this way you have not denied your emotions but have opened them up to the Lord and asked for His help. Not pretending, but being real and honest in His presence, is part of the mourning process. (Taken from Every Day With Jesus, The Blessed Life, 18-19 July)
So how can someone who mourns be happy and blessed, the answer: God’s comfort cannot fully reach us until we are real people. Those who pretend they are not hurting when they are make it difficult (perhaps even impossible) for God to pour His comfort into their souls. Their pretence forms a barrier that a God who respects human freedom will not break down. Facing and being willing to feel the negative emotions of loss, grief and hurt, may not be something that excites us, but it is essential if we are to experience the emotional, mental and spiritual health we were made to enjoy. When we are willing to feel the hurt, acknowledge our emotions, and ask for God’s help, then something glorious and transformative happens – we experience deep in our souls the incredibly powerful and all-embracing comfort of our Lord. (Taken from Every Day With Jesus, The Blessed Life, 20 July)
Father, may I be willing to accept this second prescription for happiness. Please help me to take my "medicine" until I am completely whole and can be a blessing to others. In Jesus’ name. Amen. (Prayer from Every Day With Jesus, The Blessed Life, 20 July)
Matthew 5:4
Our Lord does not present the Beatitudes in a random manner, everyone was carefully and prayerfully thought through by our Lord and given a precise place in the spiritual sequence. Last week we saw that the poor in spirit are favoured by God. The kingdom of heaven is for people who are broken, depressed sinners. People who really need God. Once we see that entrance into the kingdom of God is through acknowledgement of our spiritual poverty and the acceptance of Christ’s resources then we are ready to go on and consider the next Beatitude.
"Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matthew 5:4
At first glance the second Beatitude seems somewhat strange and difficult to understand. How can someone who mourns be contented and blessed? Most commentators say that what Jesus is pointing out here is the need to mourn over our sin, to face up to the pain it causes us, and then to find comfort in Christ. But, did our Lord have something else in mind as well as this? Such as the need to face, feel and process the pain that arises within us when we meet with difficult and distressing circumstances. Mourning is the process of grieving, and grieving involves coming to terms with loss and all its attendant emotions. Our unwillingness to face the pain that comes from our losses and the hurts and injuries that occur in our lives, and mourn because of them, is one of the major causes of psychological problems. Reality must be faced. A famous psychiatrist once said, "People can’t take too much reality so they run down the convenient road of denial. And that road is a crowded highway. I should know because that is where I have to travel to find most of my patients." Being willing to accept that life is difficult will save us from unrealistic expectations which can trigger stress and even depression. Then, when troubles come, we are not surprised, but face reality in the confidence that no matter what happens to us, God will turn it to good. (Taken from Every Day With Jesus, The Blessed Life, 15 July)
Pain is temporary but denial and its consequences are forever!
When we look at life with a realistic gaze we see grim and depressing things happening around us. There are, of course, many good things that happen to people, too, but we must not blind our eyes to the bad things that occur and thus deny reality. We don’t have to become preoccupied with the sad things by constantly thinking about them, but we do have to accept that they happened. Integrity requires that whatever is true must be faced. (Taken from Every Day With Jesus, The Blessed Life, 16 July)
When an emotion arises within us which we know is unacceptable and is likely, if it continues, to mar our spiritual experience, we must not pretend it is not there. We must acknowledge it. However, it is important that we do not dump that emotion onto another person. You do not need to express an emotion to deal with it effectively, but you must acknowledge it. All we have to do is to yield to the Spirit. He will help us keep our emotions in check. Our Lord does not want us to be mastered by our emotions but to draw upon His power so that we remain in the position of mastery. When our stomachs are churning with grief, sorrow or hurt, instead of pretending that we are not feeling the pain, we should come before the Lord with a prayer something like this: "Lord, right now I am hurting so much I do not think I can endure it. I feel like screaming, running away or even hitting someone. I don’t want to feel like this, Lord, but I do. Thank you for loving me as I am. Help me know to handle my feelings in a way that glorifies You and honours Your name." In this way you have not denied your emotions but have opened them up to the Lord and asked for His help. Not pretending, but being real and honest in His presence, is part of the mourning process. (Taken from Every Day With Jesus, The Blessed Life, 18-19 July)
So how can someone who mourns be happy and blessed, the answer: God’s comfort cannot fully reach us until we are real people. Those who pretend they are not hurting when they are make it difficult (perhaps even impossible) for God to pour His comfort into their souls. Their pretence forms a barrier that a God who respects human freedom will not break down. Facing and being willing to feel the negative emotions of loss, grief and hurt, may not be something that excites us, but it is essential if we are to experience the emotional, mental and spiritual health we were made to enjoy. When we are willing to feel the hurt, acknowledge our emotions, and ask for God’s help, then something glorious and transformative happens – we experience deep in our souls the incredibly powerful and all-embracing comfort of our Lord. (Taken from Every Day With Jesus, The Blessed Life, 20 July)
Father, may I be willing to accept this second prescription for happiness. Please help me to take my "medicine" until I am completely whole and can be a blessing to others. In Jesus’ name. Amen. (Prayer from Every Day With Jesus, The Blessed Life, 20 July)
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